20th.JULY.08A shockI have two dogs.Both of them are docile a

【说明】Each sign * indicates a major alteration.Minor alternation remain unmentioned.
【修改】
20th.JULY.2008
A shock
I have two dogs,*both of which are docile and understanding.Every morning and evening,they go out to play for half an hour and come back themselves.I love them very much,*despite my friends ’ warning to be careful.*However,today they gave me a shock.After lunch,I was *surfing the Internet,when Tony,one of two dogs,barked to go out.I sent them out and *sat back to my seat.I *totally forgot them till I heard a bark almost *one hour later.I opened the door immediately and saw Billy sitting at the door,without Tony.I Whistled for Tony,without any response.I started to worry about him,as he is the most docile one.He always comes back and sits at the door after playing for a while and never goes away.I went out *without hesitation.I was whistling while *looking for him.But half an hour past,searching all the buildings and bushes around,I couldn’t find him; nobody saw him,*either.I came home with Billy sadly.Hardly had I sat down on the sofa when I heard the door being scratched.I *jumped to my feet and opened the door.Tony was sitting right at the door and looking at me!My tears *welled my eyes.I picked him up and swore that it would never happen again!
【评价】Using “hardly … when …” structure indicates the author’s strong sense of English.Some beautiful sentences add to the beauty of the journal.Pay attention to tense,conciseness and coherence.
【后记】欢迎查看我的其他回答,提出宝贵意见!

20th.JULY.08
A shock
I have two dogs.Both of them are docile and understanding.Every morning and evening ,they go out to play for half an hour and come back themseves .I love them very much ...