英语翻译I would never have such a friendship is also not willing

英语翻译
I would never have such a friendship is also not willing to such stolen,the feeling is very sad,and former still remains vivid memory,and today the results and a repeat of the complex che,even more sad,it should be said that the despair,I was at a loss you won't understand,my heart has hurt you don't understand,I want a variety of result,I just want to have a lot of things,but has never considered this result,is I can't afford to,but you tell me what should I do?do?
Even in the face of hurt me before,and I have never said hate word,because there is love,there is hate,I would rather he forget clean than to think of him,but you,but I hate,hate is cover for you,can't let go,maybe I need time,but time is not everything,maybe one day I might forget you,but how do I want to forget the pain.I know you love me,but you love me but in this kind of love I,how may
Thank you had given me the feeling of happiness,thank you to accompany me so many days and nights,thank you so much care for me,but later on I won't be so comfortably accept,after all,I really could not return to what it was before,my heart really desperate,and now I also think,why to want to do this to me?Is love,is the damage?I don't understand,really do not understand,since he does not know,then I won't deliberately want to think more,see should know that wen do not?