可乐-
Hello everyone, my presentation today is mainly about recreation，【which】is the time spent to do things that will refresh your mind and body in a healthy and positive way. For example: Recreation, Fitness and Sports, Travel, Dance, Music, Television【, and so on.】
The most popular recreational activities 【are】 fitness and sports.
【Sports fall into serval catalogs as below：】 Aerobic activities, Conditioning activities, Strength activities, Individual sports, Racquet sports, Team sports, Outdoor sports, Water sports【, and so forth.】
【Currently, there is a trend in the U.S】that people are getting more health conscious【, so they】 are exercising more for fitness. 【The common sports people usually do are:】
Bowling ,
Running/Jogging ,
Treadmill Exercise ,
Stretching ,
Fishing ,
camping ,
Hiking ,
Walking for Fitness ,
Billiards/Pool ,
Boxing ,
Darts ,
Golf ,
orseback Riding 【这里如果指的是起码的话，可以用equestrian】,
Ice Skating ,
Martial Arts ,
Roller Skating ,
Scooter Riding,
Skateboarding,
and some of the most popular sports that require teamworking are Football, basketball, Baseball, Hockey, and Soccer.
Today more and more 【ladies】are beginning to participate in sports, 【such as】 soccer, volley ball, 【and】 basketball. They also watch sports games, 【although not as many as men】. 【The male audience is about two to three times as many as female audience.】 It was once considered to be improper for ladies to be involved in sports, but this has changed now.
建议：楼主的listing太多，这样造成的后果一是读起来听众会觉得很无聊，再者也会令整篇文章的内容显得有点苍白。可以多结合一下实际的例子来阐述现况，譬如可以说说地方之间的受欢迎运动的不同：美国喜欢篮球、棒球、美式足球；英国足球最狂热，但是没人打篮球；中国乒乓球是国球，羽毛球、跳水等世界第一……然后可以分析一下为什么会出现这种现象。原因可以从场地、人文文化、体育发展趋势等方面来辩论。
真可-
My presentation today is mainly about recreation，(which can be defined as)the time spent to do things that will refresh your mind and body in a healthy and positive way. For example:
the most popular recreational activities (are) fitness and sports
A trend in the U.S is that people are getting more health conscious. (which means they would like to do more exercise to keep fit).(The most popular sports are)
In addition,some of sports based on attendance are Football, basketball, Baseball. Hockey. Soccer. (这句放在这里没什么意义）
Today more and more girls (prefer) participating in sports, they may play soccer, volley ball, or even basketball, they also watch sports games, but not (much)as (boys). (The research shows)the proportion is about two to three times as many (boys watching) sports as girls.(in the past),it it was considered un-feminine for girls to be involved (in) sports...but this (situtation has been changing)...
byw，这篇presentation感觉内容不强，太多的sports list,如果lz能找些recreation的reference,丰富一下内容，相信更好
里论外几-
recreation is the time spent to do things 应为 spend on doing things...
They are doing some sports 这里最好是说doing exercises.
And some of the most popular sports based on attendance are Football, basketball, Baseball. Hockey. Soccer.这里最后在Hockey和 Soccer之间最好加一个and 这个小细节也不要忽视
Today more and more girls are beginning to participate in sports这里, 最好是说take part in shports.
but not as many girls watch as guys.这里相对于girls，最好是说boys 而且应该说 but not as many as boys
The proportion is about two to three times as many guys watch sports as girls这里只要说
The proportion is about two to three as many as boys就可以了
It used to be that it was considered un-feminine for girls to be involved with sports
这一句就是错误百出了 首先你只要说It is used to considered that....而你句子的意思我就不明白了 没有un-feminine 这种说法 你要表达的是非女性的话直接用male就可以了 这种un的前缀是不存在的 而这样子说起来的话句子就翻译不通顺了 我也不知道该怎么修改了 如果是你些错了 可以找我我帮你再改改
QQ 317003081
clou-
润色：
Hello, everyone! My presentation today is mainly about recreation. Recreation means you spend time on what will refresh your mind and body in a healthy and positive way. For example:
Recreation
Fitness and Sports
Travel
Dance
Music
Television
And the most popular recreational activity is fitness and sports.
We can divide sports into the following:
Aerobic activities
Conditioning activities
Strength activities
Individual sports
Racquet sports
Team sports
Outdoor sports
Water sports
Now there"s a trend in America that people are getting more health conscious. So they are exercising more for fitness. They are doing some sports,such as:
Bowling
Running/Jogging
Treadmill Exercise
Stretching
Fishing
camping
Hiking
Walking for Fitness
Billiards/Pool
Boxing
Darts
Golf
Horseback Riding
Ice Skating
Martial Arts
Roller Skating
Scooter Riding
Skateboarding
And some of the most popular sports are Football, basketball, Baseball, Hockey and Soccer.
Today more and more girls are beginning to take part in sports. They may play soccer, volley ball or basketball. They also watch sports games, but not many girls watch them like boys. The proportion is about two to three times as many boys watching sports as girls. It was once considered improper for girls to be involved with sports. But now that has changed. So we need to have a new look at what"s happening around us. So much for my presentation. I"ll appreciate your suggestions or comments if you have any. Thank you!
贝贝-
你好~ 我是美国学校的学生, 以下的修改希望会对你帮助:
My presentation today is mainly about recreation. Recreation is the time spent on doing things that will refresh your mind and body in a healthy and positive way. doing fitness, playing sports, travelling, drancing, listening to music, and watching TV are all examples of recreational activities. Among these activities, fitness and sports are the most popular.
体育有分几大类 分别是：
(list)
In the U.S, people are starting to pay more attention towards their health, hence they are exercising more to improve their fitness. Some commonly practiced sports in the States include:
Bowling
Running/Jogging
Treadmilling
Stretching
Fishing
Camping
Hiking
Walking
Swimming
Boxing
Darting
Playing Golf
Orseback Riding
Ice Skating
Practicing Martial Arts
Roller Skating
Scooter Riding
Skateboarding
Some of the most popular sports are Football, basketball, Baseball. Hockey. Soccer.
Today, more and more girls are beginning to participate in sports; they may play soccer, volley ball, and play basketball. They also engage themselves in sports by watching sports games, nonetheless, the number of guys watching sports is still about two to three times more than the number of girls。It used to be that it was considered un-feminine for girls to be involved with sports...but this belief has changed...
陶小凡-
My presentation today is mainly about recreation，recreation is the time spent to do things that will refresh your mind and body in a healthy and positive way. For example:
Fitness
Recreation and Sports
Travel
Dance
Music
Television
the most popular recreational activities is Recreation
就会这一点
nicehost-
不好意思，我心有余力不足啊~
meira-
阴沟里头去的东西,不懂
S笔记-
我爱莫能助
黑桃云-
meishenme